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Five times our favourite fictional characters should have come together over a Half ‘n’ Half pizza

No disagreement has ever been resolved on an empty stomach.

In fact, we’d go so far as to argue that many of the most iconic conflicts, clashes and confrontations in our favourite fictional fables could be easily – and deliciously – resolved over a pizza.

And what better pizza to bring two unlikely allies together than a Domino’s Half ‘n’ Half?

Choose your player: Peri Peri Chicken or Garlic Prawn?

Whether you’re sitting down to dinner with your archnemesis or inviting your frenemy over for a feed, Domino’s Half ‘n’ Half means everyone can enjoy their favourite slice without having to compromise.

Now available to split for free throughout Australia, it’s the perfect meal to bond over, no matter who you’re sharing with.

Not convinced?

We’ve compiled five examples of our favourite fictional characters who could have arrived at their fairy tale ending much sooner had they sat down over a Domino’s Half ‘n’ Half pizza.

1.       Little Red Riding Hood and the Big Bad Wolf

Bear with us, but we think this short tale could do with huge do-over.

Little Red Riding Hood arrives at dear old Granny’s house. The Wolf, disguised as Granny, is tucked tightly in bed.

Now instead of bringing wine and cake, Little Red Riding Hood retrieves a piping hot Domino’s Half ‘n’ Half pizza from her picnic basket and places it on the kitchen table.

“I brought our favourite,” she announces.

“Meatlovers for you and Hawaiian for me!”

The meaty smell of crispy bacon catches the Wolf by surprise and his mouth opens in a drooling grin.

“What big teeth you have, Granny!” she exclaims.

“All the better to eat with you, my dear!”

The Wolf leaps from the bed, tears off the ridiculous nightgown he’s wearing, and – grabs a slice of Meatlovers, which he promptly gobbles in one breath.

It turns out our nefarious villain isn’t a calculated killer, he’s just hangry.

We’ve all been there.

What we all look like when we’re fanging for a slice.

No longer overcome with the urge to eat someone, the Wolf releases Granny from the closet just as the Woodsman bursts in, axe clasped firmly in one hand. While Granny makes a mental note to start locking her front door (or perhaps move to a safer neighbourhood?), the Woodsman reaches into his back pocket and retrieves his phone, the Domino’s app ready to go.

“I’m actually a vegetarian,” he divulges.

With one Half ‘n’ Half pizza on the table and another on the way, the unlikely lunch fellows sit around discussing their favourite pizza toppings before living happily ever after.

2.       Cady and Regina – Mean Girls

While schoolyard politics and high school hierarchy are almost considered a rite of passage, we think Cady Heron and Regina George could have taken an alternative path to civility.

We’re thinking of one that involves less Burn Books and sabotage, and more pizza and honest conversation.

What if, instead of presenting Regina with Kälteen Bars and misinformation, Cady extends the figurative olive branch with a Domino’s Half ‘n’ Half instead?

Friendship saved and drama avoided. That’s so fetch.

Raise your hand if you’ve ever been personally victimised by that one person who insists on ordering anchovies on their pizza? Avoid venting about them in the Burn Book and order a Half ‘n’ Half pizza instead. [Image: Reddit]

3.       John, Allison, Brian, Claire, and Andrew – The Breakfast Club

In our humble opinion, this iconic group of high school detention-goers would have been much better off as the “Lunch Club”, working through their differences over a shared love of pizza.

No need to even agree on a flavour – with Domino’s Half ‘n’ Half the whole crew could order their favourite slice without any arguments.

And if you’re not convinced, allow us to point out that eating lunch alone certainly didn’t bring them closer together.

In fact, we’d go as far to say that observing each other’s obscure lunch rituals only reinforced their differences.

Granted, resolving their issues over a pizza lunch would have significantly reduced the length of this classic film, but it also means we would never have had to bear witness to that abominable sandwich creation.

4.       Connell and Marianne – Normal People

There’s more than just pizza missing from this relationship.

And what better opportunity for Connell and Marianne to work on their communication skills than over their favourite slice?

But can you imagine these two communicatively-challenged individuals trying to order a single-flavour pizza – they’d never eat!

“What sort of pizza do you want, Marianne?”

“Oh, I don’t know Connell, what do you like?”

“Erm, I don’t know.”

“Hmm.”

[An awkward but not uncommon silence between the two ensues].

Thank goodness for Domino’s Half ‘n’ Half!

Connell orders his favourite flavour and Marianne orders hers – only the most basic of communication required.

Put down the ice cream and pick up a Domino’s menu, Marianne. [Image: thelatch.com.au]

Hey, no judgement here! The power of pizza to bring people closer is universal.

If only these two had committed to a regular pizza night early on, we think they could have avoided the subsequent miscommunication that permeates the entire first season.

5.       Thor and Loki – Thor

They’re the godly brothers divided by a rather mundane technicality.

One of them is adopted… from the family of their archnemesis (ok, so maybe not that mundane).

If Odin had mentioned this information to his competitive sons sooner, the plot of Thor, including reigniting an ancient war, NEVER NEEDED TO HAVE HAPPENED.

No doubt the topic of adoption can be a tricky one to broach, but we like to think difficult conversations are best had over a shared meal – a meal everyone can enjoy.

And with polar opposite brothers likely having polar opposite pizza preferences, a Domino’s Half ‘n’ Half pizza would have been the perfect choice.

If these two had made up over a pizza sooner, we could have had more moments like these.

What do you think, could a Godfather for Thor and a Firebreather for Loki help maintain this brotherly bond?

No matter who you’re sharing with, there’s a Domino’s Half ‘n’ Half combination for everyone. But don’t take our word for it. Order one today – to share with friend or foe – for just $15 delivered.